OUCH.

Last night's "I Love New York" reunion special was brutal. Not only did most of the loser guys get served by the HBIC, but New York herself got dumped AGAIN on live TV AGAIN, in arguably the most brutal fashion yet. Yikes.

Recapping the entire show would take too long, so I'll pick out some highlights. But I will say bravo to VH-1 for learning from the deadly dull "Flavor of Love 2" reunion and spicing this one up a bit. Now if only we could get rid of that broke-ass host, LaLa...

-Most, but not all, of the boys were back. Notably absent was Pootie, who left the competition due to a complete mental breakdown. He wasn't even referenced. Does anyone know if that guy's OK? Also, I didn't see Rico, and that's a damn shame.

-Romance made a fool of himself yet again, coming up with this absurd black-and-white ensemble and hair that New York referred to as "Cruella deVille." She also totally ragged on his "clips," which he had laminated. HA! I should probably feel sorry for these guys, but they are buffoons.

-Heat and my beloved 12-Pack showed a clip of their new venture, The Party Boys, a traveling show in which they visit bars and clubs and parade around in their tight-tight boxer briefs, doing back flips and gyrating and stuff. It's...pretty gay. New York basically said as much, although she gave them her blessing for doing their own thing. Later, though, Heat showed a video from his mom and yaya, who New York "disrespected." And let me tell you, there is some creepy-ass "Sopranos" stuff going on in the Heat household. Yowza.

-Real's new luscious, flowing locks could make him a doppelganger for Sister Patterson. Awesome.

-But not as awesome as Mr. Boston's new squeeze: Pumkin! I am not making this up! New York flipped out when her former, spit-proficient nemesis walked on stage and started snuggling with the...beguiling Mr. Boston.

-BTW: New York got some HUGE breast implants. I mean, ginormous. Perhaps built-in life preservers to help with her fear of drowning?

-When Tango was eventually brought out he predictably sparred with Whiteboy and Chance. So tiresome. Even more tiresome: Chance's ghetto thug shtick. DUDE. We have seen your home. You live on a horse farm. We have met your brother. He is --- imagine that --- decidedly un-thug-like. You are a fraud. And what's worse, you are trotting out hoary old stereotypes to cover for the fact that you're a tantrum-throwing brat. He tries to make us think he's 50 Cent, but he can barely muster R. Kelly. Gross.

-The reunion between Tango and New York was painful to watch. At first everything seemed peachy --- Tango kissed her passionately, New York was all giggly and excited, Tango referred to her as "my woman" (nice), there was a charmingly goofy clip showing the immediate aftermath of Tango's proposal. But then things got real ugly real fast when Tango got off the couch, physically distanced himself from New York, and then explained --- very poorly --- that while he went to the house to get to know Tiffany (NY's real name), what he got was New York. And he's done with New York, because she disrespected both him and his mother (which, in fairness, she totally did). He then actually got nasty, got up, and walked away, yelling, as a clearly distraught and confused New York tried to make sense of what the hell was going on. The two of them got heated, New York made disparaging remarks about the size of li'l Tango, and then told Chance she wished she'd picked him instead (GIRL, NO!).

My brother and I debated this a bit. He sides with Tango, since New York made some really awful comments about his mom's age, size, personality, etc. Not her best moment. However, Tango KNEW who New York was when he came on this show. He knew she had a spectacular bitchy streak and didn't think twice about ripping someone down. But during the competition he seemed to enjoy those lows since they came with some pretty great highs. I mean, he liked this woman enough to propose to her. And when this reunion show started and he first came out, he was seemingly all about New York --- that kiss he gave her sure wasn't a "I'm kind of pissed at you" kiss. But then he switched with a quickness and crushed her on live television AGAIN. Even if his entire proposal --- perhaps even his interest in her --- wasn't complete BS, that was NOT the way to handle the situation. I recognize that these two are not allowed to see each other between taping and reunion, but they can keep contact. He couldn't pick up the phone and discuss this matter with her privately? They met via televised show, and you could argue that it's appropriate that they finish on air. But forget New York the character for a moment and consider Tiffany the person. I find the stunt that Tango pulled deplorable, and 10 times worse than what Flav put her through, even the second time around. To me he came off as totally fake, in it only for the exposure, not unlike Hoopz from "Flavor" Season 1. But at least she had the decency to hash things out with Flav before dumping him in front of a live audience. So even though I was a Tango fan from episode 1: Boo, Tango. I hope Sister Patterson kicked his ass.

 The only good news is that this probably means we'll have an "I Love New York" Season 2. Although her comments to LaLa at the end suggested she's done with this crap, I think we all know that if there's a) cameras and b) a big enough paycheck (and with these ratings, VH-1 will definitely pony up) New York will be back. I for one will greet her with open arms. I DO have love for New York! She's made a cottage industry out of being dumped on national television. Who knew that niche even existed?

A side note: There was an awful lot of Chance's reaction, in which he gives her lines like "I never would have done this to you." Which...bullshit. You already DID that to her when she picked Tango instead. PLEASE do not give that chud his own dating show, or bring him back for "New York" vol. 2. Once was more than enough, thank you.

Look back later this week for a recap of "Charm School," which totally lived up to the hype, but not necessarily in the ways I thought it would. Best show ever!